Destiny, luck and choices........
What percentage of our lives is luck, what percentage is destiny and what percentage is choice? I think a lot about this as it applies to the bipolar because science and studies show that I was predisposed to getting this illness. But what I wonder is, had it been caught earlier, would life had been different for me or is this my destiny? Or is it not destiny at all, but just me makes choices and using bipolar as an excuse? I suppose some would argue that I just have terrible luck.
Here is my take. Life is about choices, ever second of every day, a choice is in front of us. Some of us make good choices consistently, some of us make bad choices consistently but most, like me, mix it up and make some good and some bad choices. I think that our choices, overshadow any luck or destiny that maybe coming our way. The choices we make, make us who we are. Good, bad or otherwise, you choose your life so think about what you choose.
My marriage is a choice. I choose to be married and I believe that people who are single or divorced choose that life, as well. I don't think that is is luck or destiny that I married Dan. I met him and knew that he was someone special and I held onto him, by choice. I nurture the relationship, by choice. It is not luck that we have stayed married and it is rather insulting when people say that I am lucky to have a good marriage. A good marriage is also a choice. Dan and I are both strong-willed and opinionated people therefore we know that we need to think before we speak or we could often argue. We don't always agree but we do agree to respect the other person's opinion even if we think they are ridiculous in their thought process. That isn't luck or destiny but choice.
My parenting situation is mine by choice, too. I had always know that I wanted to be a parent and parent with a husband. I knew that short of becoming a widow, I would make that happen come hell or high water. This is a choice. I chose a person who wanted to co-parent. I never intended to change Dan (not to imply that he needs changing), but love and accept him as he is. That is why we work. We love and accept each other as we are, by choice. It isn't always easy to agree on parenting within a married situation so I know that being divorced parents just wouldn't be fore me.
Not only good things have come to me by choice. I chose to drop out of college in my teens and we have had many struggles along the way. I, unfortunately, chose to show my children all the wrong choices to make as a late teen. I defied my parents advice because I knew better and because of this, my family and I paid the price. I am choosing to go back to school now but by the time I have my degree, we will be very close to being empty-nesters. Because of my choices, my children will reap little benefit from my schooling. College now isn't destiny or luck but it certainly is a lot of hard work.
I guess, in my opinion, our life is determined by our choices and although my bipolar was not a choice, and maybe my destiny mixed with a little bad luck, I had the capacity to make choices before and after my diagnosis. We chose to be educated or not. We chose to be married or not. We chose to be a single parent or not. We even chose to drink coffee or not, lol. I hope that I have instilled in my children the necessary skills to make the best choices for them. No one choice is bad and another good, just different. And what works for one person certainly may not for another. So go out, conquer, choice wisely because it is these choices not destiny or luck that will shape your life.
Here is my take. Life is about choices, ever second of every day, a choice is in front of us. Some of us make good choices consistently, some of us make bad choices consistently but most, like me, mix it up and make some good and some bad choices. I think that our choices, overshadow any luck or destiny that maybe coming our way. The choices we make, make us who we are. Good, bad or otherwise, you choose your life so think about what you choose.
My marriage is a choice. I choose to be married and I believe that people who are single or divorced choose that life, as well. I don't think that is is luck or destiny that I married Dan. I met him and knew that he was someone special and I held onto him, by choice. I nurture the relationship, by choice. It is not luck that we have stayed married and it is rather insulting when people say that I am lucky to have a good marriage. A good marriage is also a choice. Dan and I are both strong-willed and opinionated people therefore we know that we need to think before we speak or we could often argue. We don't always agree but we do agree to respect the other person's opinion even if we think they are ridiculous in their thought process. That isn't luck or destiny but choice.
My parenting situation is mine by choice, too. I had always know that I wanted to be a parent and parent with a husband. I knew that short of becoming a widow, I would make that happen come hell or high water. This is a choice. I chose a person who wanted to co-parent. I never intended to change Dan (not to imply that he needs changing), but love and accept him as he is. That is why we work. We love and accept each other as we are, by choice. It isn't always easy to agree on parenting within a married situation so I know that being divorced parents just wouldn't be fore me.
Not only good things have come to me by choice. I chose to drop out of college in my teens and we have had many struggles along the way. I, unfortunately, chose to show my children all the wrong choices to make as a late teen. I defied my parents advice because I knew better and because of this, my family and I paid the price. I am choosing to go back to school now but by the time I have my degree, we will be very close to being empty-nesters. Because of my choices, my children will reap little benefit from my schooling. College now isn't destiny or luck but it certainly is a lot of hard work.
I guess, in my opinion, our life is determined by our choices and although my bipolar was not a choice, and maybe my destiny mixed with a little bad luck, I had the capacity to make choices before and after my diagnosis. We chose to be educated or not. We chose to be married or not. We chose to be a single parent or not. We even chose to drink coffee or not, lol. I hope that I have instilled in my children the necessary skills to make the best choices for them. No one choice is bad and another good, just different. And what works for one person certainly may not for another. So go out, conquer, choice wisely because it is these choices not destiny or luck that will shape your life.
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